Having fun with baby

The fun games you play with your baby during their first year are vital to stimulating their social, mental and physical development. It’s also great bonding, and fantastic fun for you both.

Newborn to 6 months – ideas:
• soft rattles – for squeezing and shaking
• cot mobile
• baby gym and play mat
• bouncing chair or baby bean bag
• cuddly toys
• soft fabric books
• rattles for chewing and holding
• soft cubes
• bath toys
• CD of music for babies
• indoor swing

At this age, babies are fascinated by faces – after just one day, a baby will prefer their mother’s face to that of a stranger. Tiny babies love to have ‘conversations’ – so copy his smiles, frowns and gestures and talk baby talk with him. Even though they can’t hold things yet, babies still enjoy watching you wiggle a teddy or a rattle for their entertainment. Look out for ‘cues’ that show that your baby is ready to play – e.g. face-to-face contact, reaching out hands, turning eyes or head towards you, smiling, babbling and cooing. Remember, babies of this age need lots of sleep and tire very easily.

From 4 months your baby will now be reaching out and grabbing things, and will be much more physical too, maybe starting to roll or sit. To help your baby become more ‘body aware’, play physical games such as gentle swooshing them into the air, or blowing raspberries on their tummy. Reading to your baby is very important – he or she will love hearing your voice, and over time will pick up language skills quicker and develop a love of books. At this stage babies can’t focus on two things at once – so give them a new toy and they will drop and forget the one they are playing with.

6 to 12 months baby ideas:
• baby mirror
• toy telephone
• baby books – fabric and board books
• building beakers for stacking
• door bouncer/jumper
• first jigsaw puzzle

Sorting and playing comes along tremendously as your baby has more control over their hand to eye coordination. Allow plenty of time for tummy play, rolling and crawling. From baby books to shape sorters – allow your baby to play with these toys one by one and find out how things work for themselves, with on hand help from you if needed. Intricate rattles with more parts, loops and textures can be really interesting to your baby now.

Consider toys for the pushchair, highchair and in the car, to help avoid your baby getting bored. Start bedtime stories from around 6 months (or before) – even if only short and sweet your baby will love the attention. Baby swimming, tumble tots or baby yoga might also be worth trying at this stage – ask your Health Visitor for details.

Recovering from birth

Nothing can prepare you for the mind-blowing impact of having a baby. Your nether regions will be very sore, your breasts will be tender, huge and unfamiliar, and you’re likely to be very hormonal. The first weeks will be a strange, dreamlike twilight zone, where night and day merge into one, and you wander around in an exhausted but euphoric haze. You’ll never know tiredness like this again, but there will be days when you’ll be so bursting with love for your baby, you’ll cry.

Immediately after the birth:
If you gave birth in hospital, try to make the most of your time there to rest and learn about caring for your baby (especially if your first baby). The midwives will spend as much time with you as they can, helping you breastfeed and teaching you how to bathe the baby and change his nappy. But if you feel you’re not getting enough attention, it is very important to say so. A midwife will also visit you regularly at home over the next few days, so make the most of her experience and ask anything you need to ask.

For the 10% of mums whose baby is whisked away at birth and placed in the hospital’s Special Care Baby Unit (known as SCBU), this is a worrying time, as they know doctors think their baby needs special medical attention. There’s no doubt it can be scary to see your newborn wired up in an incubator, but don’t forget your emotions are likely to be all over the place, and they really are in the best possible hands.

Back home with baby:
Many mums spend a day or two in hospital after the birth, which means they get home just as their milk kicks in, the baby blues hit and everyone wants to come and visit. Try these coping tips:

1. Forget about housework and cooking, just sleep when you can (hard I know).
2. Remind yourself continually that this chaos won’t last.
3. Remind yourself that you need to rest to make milk for your baby.
4. Don’t get hung up on bathtimes. If your baby loves a bath (and dads are just as good at doing baths as mum) then great. If he really doesn’t like being bathed, just ‘top and tail’ (wash face and bottom) for a few days.
5. Don’t worry about daytime versus night-time clothes – your baby won’t know the difference. As long as he’s clean, he doesn’t need to be in a new outfit twice a day.
6. If your baby is fractious, experiment with different holding positions and – if that fails – hand him to someone else. Quite often a calmer pair of arms (and a body that doesn’t smell of breast milk) will settle him. If there’s no one else around, place him in his cot/Moses basket, check he’s safe, then walk away for a few minutes. Sometimes babies get over-stimulated and just want a bit of time on their own to cool off.
7. Don’t torture yourself by trying to remember how many times you were up during the night so you can play ‘competitive exhaustion’ with your partner or other mums.

Your post-birth body:
Having been through birth, your body will need time to recover. You’ll be bleeding quite heavily (even if you had a c-section), and your breasts will probably leak. Don’t expect to feel sexy! Your bedtime outfit will include: a sleep bra to hold breast pads in place; huge knickers stuffed with an industrial-size sanitary pad: and a big nightie to cover the whole lot up when you’re pacing the corridors all night. But rest assured, it will pass. Bleeding stops after about a month (sometimes much sooner), the leaky boobs will settle down once feeding gets into a rhythm, and eventually, your baby will adopt a sleeping routine which means you can spend most of the night in bed, ideally asleep!

Two weeks later:
After two weeks your midwife will discharge you and your partner will most likely go back to work. This can be a tough time, as sleep-deprivation will be building up, and that initial ‘I’ve had a baby!’ euphoria could be wearing off. A happy, snoozy baby may develop colic, and crying levels could significantly increase. Try these tips:

1. Make the most of your health visitor. She’s a specialist in baby problems and will have lots of solutions for you to try.

2. Make use of visitors. Ask them to cuddle the baby while you have a bath. You don’t have to run around after them, they should be looking after you!

Never turn down any offer of help. In fact, write a list of jobs and allocate them to anyone who asks.
If you’re beginning to feel as if everyone is interested in the baby and not you, say to yourself: ‘I grew this baby, I’m amazing, I matter’. And repeat it. Often.

Returning to the workplace

Lots of women will find it refreshing to hear that life as you know it is not over when you have a baby :-)
A very high proportion of women return to work after giving birth and have highly successful careers!!!

Latest figures collected by Labour Market Trends show that two-thirds of women in employment while pregnant now return to work at the end of their maternity leave. Half of all mothers with pre-school children now work, with one-third working full-time and two-thirds working part-time.

All working women are entitled to maternity leave. There are two lengths of maternity leave depending on how long you have been working for your employer: Ordinary Maternity Leave (OML) and Additional Maternity Leave (AML). OML lasts for 26 weeks. It doesn’t matter how long you have been working for your employer or how many hours you work, all employees are entitled to OML from day one. AML lasts for 26 weeks and starts at the end of ordinary maternity leave. You are entitled to take AML if you have worked for your employer for 26 weeks by the 15th week before your baby is due.

When you decide to return to work, if you want to work part-time, or work as a job-share, you have the right to ask your employer. Legally, your employer must and will consider your request and cannot simply refuse without reason. Most working mothers of pre-school children work part-time, this is often a good compromise between being at home and working full-time.

Breastfeeding and returning to work?
Expressing breast milk is a useful skill to learn, especially if you anticipate being away from your baby for more than a few hours in the first few months. It will mean forward planning and extra organisation on your part, but it does mean your baby can continue to have the benefits of breast milk.

To maintain your milk supply, feed your baby first thing in the morning and when you get home from work in the evening. Depending on your baby’s age and needs you may also need to express milk during the day. New developments in expressing products, including portable briefcase sized pumps with insulated bottles, mean that expressing at work is easy and convenient.

Coping with separation?
Some mothers find going back to work while their baby is still very young something of an ordeal. If you are finding it hard to make a decision about whether to go back to work or not, try to be clear about your situation, aims and objectives, bearing in mind that no decision is everlasting or unchangeable.

Childcare choices:-
Before you decide what sort of childcare will suit you best, go through all the options. If your parents are still young, they might like to get involved – it’s much much cheaper and often more reassuring if nanna is looking after your one and only (this was our preference). A few big employers, such as hospitals and government offices, offer workplace crèches, which are good value for money and have the added benefit of enabling you to pop down to see your child during your lunch break. Childminders and daycare nurseries are cheaper than nannies but may not offer your child one-to-one care, which you may feel your baby needs, particularly when so small.

Once you have decided what childcare arrangements you are going to use, you could spend time with the new carer before you have to leave for work so you get used to another person looking after your baby. You could leave the baby for an hour or so with the new carer while you go to get your hair cut, go shopping or pamper yourself by having a massage or a beauty treatment.

Above all, don’t feel guilty. Remember that few things in life are perfect, whether you stay at home full-time or go out to work. But many mothers do go out to work because they share the financial responsibility of running the home with their partner and for other reasons; social contact, mental stimulation, career and whether a woman wants to be with her children all the time. Many women find the whole subject confusing and fraught with anxiety. If you talk about your feelings with your partner or a trusted friend, things may become a little clearer so you can feel confident about your decision.

Parental leave:
The parents of every child born on or after 15 December 1999 can now take up to 13 weeks of unpaid leave per parent per child, up until the child’s fifth birthday. This can be taken to cover emergencies such as a child’s illness, a childminder’s illness, or a ‘luxury’ if you want to spend more time with your child. However, legally, you must give 21 days written notice before you plan to take parental leave.

Tips to become pregnant

When you decide to have a baby, you want to get pregnant now. Being patient is okay until you actually switch into babymaking mode. Getting pregnant is not as easy as some believe, even if you do everything “right,” you still have only a 25% to 30% chance of conceiving in any given cycle.

To increase your chances, start taking folic acid now. You reduce your chances of giving birth to a baby with a neural tube defect (for example, anencephaly or spina bifida) by 50% to 70% if you start taking at least 0.4 mg of folic acid each day two to three months before you start trying to conceive.

Try to keep sex fun when you’re trying to conceive. Use rooms other than the bedroom or schedule your babymaking rendezvous for an odd time of day. The rationale? You won’t be able to keep up the babymaking pace for very long if sex starts feeling like a chore.

Don’t hop up and run to the bathroom right after you make love. Lying down for at least a few minutes (some fertility experts say five minutes) after intercourse increases the odds that the sperm will be able to keep their date with the awaiting egg and that you’ll win at baby roulette.

Make love often during your fertile period (the five days leading up to ovulation). If you’ve got the stamina to make love at least every 2 days, you will ensure that there’s a fresh shipment of sperm waiting in the fallopian tube at any given time. Of course, you can get too much of a good thing if your partner has a low sperm count, so if you’re aware of a pre-existing fertility problem, you’ll want to talk this issue over with a specialist.

Here’s a bit of sex-related trivia, just in case you and your partner are looking for a little inspiration:

Are you a coffee drinker? Time to give it up or switch to decaf! Caffeine is thought to restrict the growth of a developing baby by constricting blood vessels and reducing blood flow to the uterus. What’s more, a few studies have indicated that excessive consumption of caffeine (that is, more than three cups of drip coffee per day) may contribute to fertility problems. The jury is still out on this last point, however.

Are you or your partner regularly exposed to hazardous substances in the workplace? You may need to consider a job change or job modification before you start your family. Certain substances can affect both the quality of sperm and the development of the embryo.

Have you had your preconception checkup yet? Set up an appointment with your doctor to review your medical history and to talk about your plans to start trying to conceive. Are you currently taking any prescription or over-the-counter drugs? Be sure to ask your doctor if it’s safe for you to continue taking them once you start trying to conceive. If you aren’t already doing so, start keeping a menstrual calendar. Note the date when your period starts, the number of days it lasts, and anything else your doctor might want to know about. This information could prove helpful if you experience problems in conceiving. It can also prove invaluable in pinpointing the date of conception and consequently your due date. Try to book the last appointment of the day for your preconception checkup. That’s when your doctor or midwife is most likely to be able to take the time to answer your questions and address your concerns without feeling rushed to go on to the next patient.

Make your vaginal environment as sperm-friendly as possible. Avoid vaginal sprays and scented tampons (which can cause a pH imbalance in your vagina); artificial lubricants, vegetable oils, and glycerin (because they can kill off sperm); saliva (because saliva can also kill sperm); and douching (because it alters the normal acidity of the vagina; can cause vaginal infections and/or pelvic inflammatory disease; and may wash away the cervical mucus that is needed to transport the sperm).

If you are monitoring cervical mucus in an attempt to predict your most fertile days, do your checks before you shower or swim. These activities can affect both the quantity and quality of your cervical mucus.

Baby Toy Guide

Did you know newborns spend most of their time watching and learning from our expressions and voice? Soon toys begin to play a fun role in baby’s development.

The following toys are ideal for the various stages of your baby’s first year……as I know from my little ones :-)

From newborn to 6 weeks a baby will be drawn to high contrast colours and patterns with cot mobiles, play mats and bright soft toys all great gift ideas.

From about 3 – 6 months a baby will begin to be able to roll over, may start to respond to his or her own name, and might be able to find partly hidden objects. At this stage, fabric books rattles and soft cuddly toys are ideal.

From about 6 to 8 months little one’s will be showing greater precision in picking up and grasping objects, may be sitting up with support, and starting to babble and make different sounds. At this point, stacking beakers, wooden blocks, baby mirror, bath toys, small card books and teething rings are very appropriate.

From 8 to 12 months baby will respond to a wide variety of stimuli, might be crawling or even beginning to walk, and may even start to say a few words(this is where the fun starts lol). In my experience this is when a toy telephone, chunky play bricks, musical toys, pull along toys and ride on toys (12months) come into their own.

Play it safe!!! Dispose of packaging after opening the toy, keep toys away from fire, watch out for older children playing with toys that have small parts, close to your baby, always use a harness when using swings and put toys away after use to avoid falls, and do not leave toys on the stairs.

Happy playing!

Unemployed parents to benefit from new government childcare & learning scheme.

The government has launched a new scheme offering free childcare and support for parents keen to return to work.

In a bid to reach families from disadvantaged backgrounds, this initiative aims to help parents to find work without the financial burden of childcare – which can outweigh the actual income!

Eligible parents, who are unemployed and interested in training for work, will receive free childcare spaces while they acquire new skills and qualifications for employment.

Children’s Minister Beverley Hughes said: “We know that for those who can, work remains the best way to lift families and children out of poverty. High quality childcare not only supports parents back into employment but it promotes and improves positive outcomes for children, helping to ensure that all children … can reach their full potential”.

Families with one partner in work, an annual household income of £20,000 or less, a child or children aged 14 or under or 18 for children with disabilities are eligible for the learning support.

According to the national childcare charity Daycare Trust, the average cost of full-time nursery place for a child under the age of two is £167 a week in England – the equivalent of £8,500 a year!!! This figure is an increase of five per cent compared to last year with parents struggling as a result.

When to have a baby????

Deciding to have a baby is a big step (believe me I know), but the next thing to worry about is whether it matters what time of the year you have your child.

Not only will it matter to you during your pregnancy, but it may also affect your child’s health.

Of course, conceiving to a timetable is far more difficult than it sounds, but to help you choose an approximate time of the year, read on.

The weather:
You may decide that you want your baby to be born in early autumn, so they’re old for their school year but that means you’ll be pregnant during the summer and that can be very uncomfortable, especially if it happens during the third trimester.

Many women choose a spring baby because it pretty much avoids being pregnant during the summer months and the final trimester happens in winter, which means you’ll be wrapped up anyway.
Spring is another good option for a child, because the main cold and flu season is over by March and April, so your little one will be less likely to pick up something in their early weeks.

Family situations:
When does the rest of your family have a birthday? Perhaps you’d like everyone to all have their special day around the same time, or perhaps you want to space them out (could get expensive at the same time of year).

Some people think that it’s better to have a child’s birthday not coinciding with major holidays or events, such as Christmas, or maybe summer’s better because you can go on holiday and celebrate.

All these concerns vary for all families so you can see how things might differ, depending on your situation.

Your work:
Obviously, once you have your baby you go on maternity leave and that’s done. But have you considered if your pregnancy might be more difficult at certain times of the year, depending on your job?

If you know that your job requires you to travel more during a busy season, then you might want to avoid being in late pregnancy around then.

Similarly if your work is influenced by the wedding industry, the summer is bound to be your busiest time and being in full bloom during July and August won’t make your job any easier.

Even not having your partner around during the end of the pregnancy might be a factor, so think hard about when your baby is likely to be born.

2009 top baby names!!!

In 2009, newborn baby names continued to embrace a mix of classic and contemporary names. And while the rest of the list was full of surprises, the top two names from 2008 maintained their hold.

For boys, Aidan ranked No. 1 for the third year running.

Isabella, and variations Isabel and Bella, topped the girls list for the second straight year.

(Source: parents.com reader poll).

Haiti earthquake pledge

As search and rescue operations wind down, Oxfam is helping survivors of the Haiti earthquake begin the long process of recovery with cash-for-work projects, water, sanitation and shelter. At Primo Bambino, we want to support this cause and if you quote ‘Haiti’ at checkout we promise to donate £3 to the Oxfam charity with every order no matter how small and also give you free shipping worth £5 just to say thank ‘you’ for supporting this cause.